imo the best way to interpret those “real people don’t do x” writing advice posts is “most people don’t do x, so if a character does x, it should be a distinguishing trait.” human behavior is infinitely varied; for any x, there are real people who do x. we can’t make absolute statements. we can, however, make probabilistic ones.

for example, most people don’t address each other by name in the middle of a casual conversation. if all your characters do that, your dialogue will sound stilted and unnatural. but if just one character does that, then it tells us something about that character.

[Image description: A picture of Gordon Ramsay in a white shirt, looking down with a tired expression. Youtube captions below him read: “delicious. Finally, some good fucking food.” End description.]

@a-captions-blog

For old times sake is actually such a heartbreaking and beautiful sentiment. Like, let’s do it for the love that used to be here. It is reason enough.

why has no one fallen in love w/ me yet i’m so bored

unwilling narrator

the weight of a story is hard to bear but someone's gotta be atlas

Lemony Snicket

I know some people get nervous about interacting directly so I just want y'all to know I appreciate you.

In my defense, I have none
For never leaving well enough alone
But it would've been fun
If you would've been the one